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Las cosas que le hacen gracia a un programador

Canción del Programador

100 errores en el programa
 100 pequeños errores en el programa
 corrijo uno, lo compilo de nuevo...
 ...101 pequeños errores en el programa

101 errores en el programa
 101 pequeños errores en el programa
 corrijo uno, lo compilo de nuevo...
 ...102 pequeños errores en el programa

(repetir hasta que no queden errores)

Diagrama de Flujo De Resolución universal de problemas

             #####################################

             #                                   #

             #  DIAGRAMA DE FLUJO DE RESOLUCION  #

             #      UNIVERSAL DE PROBLEMAS       #

             #                                   #

             #####################################

                        +------------+

                        | ¿Funciona? |

               Sí       +------------+         No

     .------------------------|----------------------------.

     |                                                     |

     |                                                     V

     |                                     Sí      +--------------+

     |                                     .-------| ¿Lo tocaste? |

     |                                     |       +--------------+

     |                                     V               |

     |      +-------------------+      +-----------+       | No

     |      | ¿Lo sabe alguien? |<-----| ¡IMBÉCIL! |       |

     |      +-------------------+      +-----------+       |

     |         |             |                             V

     V         | No          | Sí          Sí       +------------+

+---------+    |             |           .----------|  ¿Tendrás  |

| ¡No lo  |    |             |           |          | problemas? |

| toques! |    |             |           |          +------------+

+---------+    |             V           V                 | No

     |         |          +------------------+             V

     |         |          | ¡Pobre bastardo! |<-.   +------------+ 

     |         |          +------------------+  |   |  Pasa del  |

     |         V                   |            |   |    tema    |

     |  +-------------+            V            |   +------------+

     |  | ¡Escóndelo! |   +------------------+  |No        |      

     |  +-------------+   |  ¿Puedes culpar  |--·          |      

     |         |          |    a alguien?    |             |      

     |         |          +------------------+             |      

     |         |                   | Sí                    |      

     |         |                   V                       |      

     |          ·--------->+------------------+            |

     ·------------------->|  SIN PROBLEMAS   |<------------·

                          +------------------+

Y la ya mítica canción Code Monkey :)


Code Monkey get up get coffee.

Code Monkey go to job.

Code Monkey have boring meeting,

With boring manager Rob.

Rob say Code Monkey very diligent,

But his output stink.

His code not functional or elegant,

What do Code Monkey think?

 Code Monkey think maybe manager wanna write god damn login page himself.

Code Monkey not say it out loud.

Code Monkey not crazy, just proud.

(Chorus)

 Code Monkey like freetos.

Code Monkey like tab and mountain dew.

Code Monkey very simple man,

With big warm fuzzy secret heart.

Code Monkey like you.

Code Monkey like you.

Code Monkey hang around at front desk,

Tell you “sweater look nice.”

Code Monkey offer buy you soda,

Bring you cup, bring you ice.

You say no thank you for the soda cause,

soda make you fat

Anyway, you busy with the telephone,

no time for chat.

Code Monkey have long walk back to cubical,

he sit down pretend to work.

Code Monkey not thinking so straight.

Code Monkey not feeling so great.

(Chorus x1)

Code Monkey have every reason

to get out this place.

Code Monkey just keep on working

to see your soft, pretty face.

Much rather wake up eat a coffee cake

take bath, take nap.

“This job fulfilling in creative way.”

Such a load of crap.

Code Monkey think some day he have everything, even pretty girl like you.

Code Monkey just waiting for now.

Code Monkey says “someday, somehow.”

(Chorus x1)


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